When I was in middle school I joined the band. I chose to play clarinet which turned out to be a great choice for me. I took to the instrument and quickly advanced to first chair in the beginning band. Initially I had no idea playing in the band would be such a commitment. We were required to attend all practices and you could not be late. We had practice in the morning before school. We were required to take band as a class. We practiced immediately after school and at night. You see, our school had one of the top programs in the county and performed exceptionally at annual competitions.
Basketball season was approaching and I decided I wanted to try out for the team. I was cut the year before but I wanted to give it another shot. The issue was, I had band practice after school and in order to make basketball practice on time I would have to leave band everyday 5 minutes early. Since I attended band practice 4 times per day, never missing practice and always on time, I felt my Bandmaster would surely allow me to leave 5 minutes early every afternoon. Boy, was I wrong. He said “No” without offering any explanation.
Of course, this angered me and left me faced with a tough decision. Although I wanted to do both, I left the band and made the basketball team. It turned out to be an excellent decision because I discovered one of my gifts. I had an uncanny ability for the sport. I developed into a star player by the time I attended high school. I was so sure of myself, I told my mother, she and dad didn’t have to worry about saving money for my college education. I was going to get a basketball scholarship and that’s exactly what happened.
I had an illustrious high school career, I was an A honor roll student and accepted a full ride scholarship to Florida State University. I was excited about attending FSU because my brother was a student there. One day, while preparing to head off to college, my brother asked me a simple yet profound question. He said, “how do you feel about going off to college?” My response was, “what if I don’t fit in?” He then said “Lahna, Just Be Yourself.” I had no idea that statement was in alignment with my life’s purpose.
To be yourself is often times easier said than done but the good news is it can be done. I went through the fire. There is so much about me that doesn’t fit into the proverbial box. What society says I should look like, act like, and be like is not what’s happening here. I admit early on I attempted to assimilate in certain areas of my life but it served to be too exhausting. Nobody deserves to be placed in those types of restraints based on another opinion of whats acceptable and what’s beautiful.
Today I am walking in my purpose, shedding all those old beliefs which do not affirm and honor me. Just being you is so liberating and beautiful because you get to shine your light and share your gifts with the world, which is more fulfilling than just existing as some water down version of the true you. My brother is no longer here in the physical but I certainly appreciate the precious times we shared and the seed he planted in me which has blossomed and continues to bless others. “Just Be Yourself.”
